Friday, March 23, 2012

What Not to Do When Facing a Custody Battle..........

To most people going through a divorce, children are the most important aspect.  Unfortunately, sometimes, when emotions run high, people lose sight of what is most important.  If you are attempting to have primary physical custody of your children, there are things that you can do, and things that you should avoid doing, in order to help your custody case.

·         Focus on your children.  The person who takes care of the children obviously has an advantage in custody cases.  Many people falsely believe that mothers have an advantage.  This is not the case in Indiana.  If you want custody, it is important to take the time to do the morning routine (get the children up, feed them breakfast, take them to childcare/school, etc.) and the evening routine (feed them dinner, help with homework, play with them, take them to extracurricular activities, put them to bed, etc.)  It is important to just be involved.

·         Avoid a paper trail.  E-mail and text messaging are some of the best ways parents can communicate; however, this also harms a lot of parents in custody cases.  It is extremely important not to show your negativity in e-mails and/or text messaging.  Don’t use profanity.  And most importantly, do not act like your children aren’t your priority.  It will be used against you.

·         Don’t disparage the other parent.  It is not good for your children to hear you speak negatively about the other parent.  Judges do not like it. The Court wants to know that you are being cooperative and putting the children first.  You can’t put the children first when you are constantly trying to put down the other parent. 

·         Listen to your attorney.  Your attorney wants to help you.  If you aren’t sure about something—ask.  He/she knows the law and can help guide you through the process.  

At Hollingsworth & Zivitz, P.C., our team has the experience, the understanding, and the compassion to assist with your family law needs. If you have questions or concerns regarding divorce, custody, support, or any other family law concerns contact our firm at 317.569.2200 or

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